Tuesday, November 27, 2007

My Week in LA

Ok, I would like to first apologize to my loyal reader(s?) who have been missing my posts. I have been very busy, but I am sorry.


Ok, I would like to give the highlights of my trip home. In order to do so without writing a freakin' book, I will give a highlight per day.


Friday: My flight out to LA... HORRIBLE.

I had the middle seat. Crazy sighing man was sitting to my left and socially retarded man was sitting to my right. I don't really feel like getting into all the particulars, but lets just say all normal social courtesies were thrown out the window.


Saturday: The Craft Fair!

I went to this craft/art fair with my aunt. It was super cool, AND I procured this painting:



Sunday: Dad arrives!

My dad got in Sunday afternoon. It was so nice to see him! For dinner my dad, aunt, grandparents and I went to one of my favorite french restaurants. Just as dinner was ending, my father casually asked me how my roommate was. A seemingly benign question at first glance. However, my grandmother latched on to it and started asking me questions as well. "Oh, your roommate. How nice," grandma says, "What does she do? Is she a student too?" Hmmm. This is not going to go well. So I say, "Actually grandma, my roommate is a man, and he is in computers."

"A MAN!" Grandma says. Then, without skipping a beat she looks at me and asks, "do you share the bed?" Then grandpa looks at her and says, "Now, lets not get too inquisitive." Although his inner monologue was the same as mine: "I know you didn't just ask your grandchild if she's boning her roommate."

After removing my jaw from the where it dropped on the table, I simply replied to the question as matter of factly as possible. "No, we don't even share the same room."

Monday: Piano and stupid school work

I worked on a research paper for most of Monday and spent a few hours playing the piano. Not much to say here.

Tuesday: The Seedy Sports Bar

On Tuesday I met up with some girls that I went to high school with. I hadn't seen them in 10 years up until my 10 year reunion the week before (don't ask, it was not fun.) So, we met downtown and went to a brewery that I had never heard of. Now, for those of you that don't know, California has a requirement by the health board that each eating establishment be rated according to health standards. Most places get A's. I have never in my life seen a C before. And I think I have only seen one or two B's. This fine establishment had earned a B. From what I understand, short of bugs or fecal matter in the food, it is quite difficult to get a B. Nonetheless, I decided that this would be the perfect place to order a risky food group: chicken. The company and the beer was great, the food even tasted fine. I do believe that I ended up with a mild case of food poisoning though because the following morning I woke up with a three day long bout of atomic diarrhea.

(Side note: I also got my hair done in the morning, super fun!)

Wednesday: "Excuse me, where is your restroom?"

I wasn't feeling well most of the day and was restricted to only going places with restrooms near by. So my dad and I did some shopping. It was pretty low key. Then we went to "The Bear Pit" for dinner. Samson- you would freakin love this place!

Thursday: Turkey Day!

Fairly self explanatory. Food, food, and more food. And lots of napping. Also, I worked on my paper some more.

Friday: Coffee with good friends and a special lunch with Jare-Bare

Friday started with a fun little walk down the street to have coffee with a couple that lives there. It was just like old times, super fun to get to catch up like that. Then, for lunch I got the chance to meet up with a friend from college that I hadn't seen in a long time. What fun!!

Saturday: The flight home- Engine Problems

Yeah, so, the flight home sucked. My first flight (early in the morning) was brought back to the gate after we left because of engine problems. These "engine problems" were at first described as an air conditioning problem. LIARS!!

So they moved me to another flight but then I missed my connection. They then tried to send me to a different airport and I had to explain to Lenny behind the counter the difference between flying into Washington (Regan airport) vs. Washington Dulles (my airport). Just so you know, its about 45 min. Once they finally got all that fixed they flew me to North Carolina, where I again had the middle seat. Man on my left had some of the most offensive breath ever, period. He also had one of those leg bouncing things going on, ahhh. Man on my right didn't speak English, which was a nice change from the flight on the way into LA, however, the flight attendants seemed to expect me to act out all their questions to him. Charades, anyone? Yeah, so then they delayed my connection into DC. They also hid my luggage, which was a fun game for me, but after 45 min of playing hide and seek, I was less than tolerant.

After spending 12 hours in the airport/airplane, I had to take a cab home because my roommate declared that he would no longer be able to pick me up. Thanks.

So that was my super fun week! I will try to be better about updating, but finals are coming up. And, of course, my birthday! I know you remembered, but I just thought I would mention it.

Friday, November 9, 2007

"Um, hi, 911? This isn't REALLY an emergency"

Ok, so the good news about today is: it is better than yesterday! Yesterday was an all in all not so good day. For one, I had my grumpiest pair of grumpy pants on. And for two, I appear to be going through a rough patch right now, marked by considerable depression and anxiety. Not to fear, I am sure things will work themselves out, it just appears that my normal coping mechanisms are not readily equipped to handle what I am going through. Ok, enough of that...

Last night I had class until late in the evening, then I went to Starbucks (my home away from home) to work on a really stupid paper I am writing. The best thing about writing this paper is that now, I not only get to feel like an idiot most of the time, I get to proof-read my idiocy! Oh good! So, after Starbucks closed, I met up with a friend and had a drink, under the guise of discussing the piece of poo I am trying to turn into a research paper. Knowing full well that I had to be up at the rear-end crack of dawn (4:30 am) to catch a flight to L.A. (here now, its gorgeous!) I stayed at the bar til a little after midnight.

Ok, so I get home, and I am exhausted. I was trying to consider if I should attempt packing now, or just get up and throw some undies into a Target bag, when I pulled into a parking spot in front of my building. Then something in the bushes catches my eye. Oh look, it's a man crouched in the fetal position swaying back and forth like he's Rainman ("definitely, definitely Rainman" (sidenote: I heart you Matt!)).

Now I have to get out of my car with this crazy dude doing God know what (vomiting maybe?) I have to admit I was a little frightened. I got out of my car and walked around the back so I wouldn't have to use the sidewalk he was occupying. I was still berating myself for not checking to see if this man was ok (maybe someone beat him up and he was writhing on the ground?), when I was getting Mr. Wonderdog ready to go out. I took him out for his night time constitutional and noticed that the scary man was still there. But now he was laying, half on the sidewalk, half in the bushes. I finished with the dog and went inside to figure some things out.

Ok, think. This could be a bad man. I am home alone. (Sidenote: I don't have time for this crap, I have to wake up in 4 hours!) Ok, what if he's hurt. He can't stay there all night, it is going to drop below freezing, I would feel terrible if I could have done something to help him while he is freezing to death. I know!! I'll call the police! Ok, great, a plan. Now, what's the number for the police? I don't want to call 911, I don't feel like I'm in real danger. Get the phone book... oh good, they have the police listed: 911. Hmm. Ok, I guess I'll call 911.

Heroic 911 operator (man): 911 emergency, where are you located!
Me (tentative): Um, really I was just trying to reach the police.
Annoyed 911 operator (same man): Well, ma'am this is not the number for the non-emergency police.
Me (a little irritated by his tone): Ok, well, it isn't really an emergency, but there is a strange man writhing around in the bushes outside my house and I am a little concerned.
Resigned 911 operator: Where are you located?

The conversation when on from there, and I must say I felt vindicated that he took my info and said he would send someone out. The worst part was the sound of disgust I got when asked about the man's race: "Um, I don't know, all I could see was his legs and his sneakers lying across the sidewalk." Seriously, your pissed at me for not saying, "excuse me sir, I realize that you are either evil, drunk, or seriously injured, but would you mind telling me your national origin?"

Enter the other dumb dog. As my roommate was not here this evening I had to take his little charmer of a dog out. This usually involves me on all fours with a hand full of dog treats pulling her out from under the bed. She must have really had to pee last night because she came with no hassle.

I took the little princess across the condo parking lot to the place where she prefers to do her business. Suddenly an SUV pulls up and parks around the corner. It is now close to 1 am and I observe two men emerge from the vehicle. They look at each other and look around a little before heading straight over to my little invalid friend on the sidewalk/in the bush. I see them standing over him and speaking in harsh hushed tones. OH CRAP. Now what? I begin to casually saunter closer to their vehicle (yeah, right, casual my ass). I decide maybe I should at least get their license plate number because the police will be here any minute and if the bad men should happen to abscond with the body, I want to be able to give them something.

Thankfully, at that moment, two patrol cars pulled up. I couldn't really tell what was going on, partly because I couldn't hear and partly because my Spanish isn't that good (at least I think it was Spanish?) The police seemed to have everything under control so I quickly made my way inside.

I wish I had a better ending to this story, but honestly, I don't know what happened. The police must have taken Rainman AND his two buddies in because the SUV was still there after the cops left and this morning before I left for the airport.

Ah, the life of a concerned citizen...

Punkin Chunkin 2007

Last Sunday I went to the World Championship Punkin Chunkin. What's this?, you might ask, a crazy pumpkin catapulting competition created by hicks? Yep, that's right!! It was really pretty cool. Some friends and I drove out to Delaware (because they don't do things like this in respectable states) and enjoyed the festivities. Really it is a contest to see who can shoot the pumpkin the farthest. There is a cannon competition and a catapult competition. Enjoy the pictures. Also, check out the website for a count down til next year's CHUNK! (http://www.punkinchunkin.com/main.htm)



Pumpkin Canons!



A Pumpkin Catapult!!



An ill fated little guy...


Friday, November 2, 2007

Me, Selfish?

I heart potato chips. Really, just chips in general. Doritos, chips and salsa, kettle chips, chips, chips, chips. (With the exception of the salt and vinegar and the lime chips, those are nastified.) Having said that, I must say that I rarely allow myself to engage in chip eating activities unless they are of the baked chip variety. I have found that I really do enjoy the baked Lays (in all sorts of flavors now (try the BBQ or the sour cream and Cheddar, yum!)) but honestly, if I was throwing caution to the wind I doubt I would elect baked chips.

The last couple of days have been very rough for me. I have been very sad, stressed, lonely, feeling under appreciated, unloved, and generally engaging in a huge pity party for myself. I am sure this will all pass, but in order to help it along, I decided to celebrate my foul mood with some bona fide, genuine potato chips. I was at school working on a 10 page-single-spaced research assignment that is due in two days (that was assigned two days ago, ahem a**hole!) when I took a jaunt into the food area/where the mean people work. I saw some Kettle chips. It was like a light went on from heaven above the chip display, aaaaa... I looked for the New York Cheddar chips, which are a personal favorite of mine, but there were none. Ho hum, another setback. BUT WAIT! There were some BBQ chips, sign me up for those! I procured the chips from the "cashier" (aka, witch with a B) at the counter and was on my way. I wasn't quite ready to eat my chips, so I put them in my bag and finished what I was working on.

I had to work tonight so I packed up my school stuff in the afternoon and started my arduous journey home. It was slow moving through down town DC, but it was a nice day so I had my window rolled down. I was chillin' in a line of traffic when I heard my chips calling. "MMM, yes chips, what's that? Of course I will eat you now!" Open chips and commence eating. Yum, real potato chips! Wow! All of a sudden the substantial gentleman in the row of traffic opposing me leans out his window and says, "can I have one?"

Picture this, there was construction on both sides of this small two lane street, so both lanes of cars were pushed toward the middle. The driver side of the truck is pulled even with my driver's side and we are both stopped (and not moving) at opposing traffic lights in either direction.

I must admit, I looked at him as if he had two heads. So he repeated himself, "can I have one?" Are you joking? These are real potato chips here sir, you apparently don't understand the gravity of this situation. So I merely looked at him, smiled, and shook my head while saying "no." This is when he became outraged. "Oh, I see," he yelled at me, "you're gonna be selfish!" Thankfully by this time my light had changed and the cars in front of me had started to move. It was, however, a while before I stopped looking in my rear view mirror to see if he had doubled back to try to get my potato chips.